The Day I Went to Planned Parenthood and My View of Phil. 4:19 Changed.

I have been feeling led by the Holy Spirit to post this, but have been resistant. He is telling me someone out there needs to hear my story to help change theirs. So here it is, painful, but honest and real. 

I don’t often speak of my Journey into Motherhood. They were desperate years and I honestly had few people who knew to help, so thereimages (7) I sat already into my 2nd trimester in the waiting room of Planned Parenthood. I was there because I had no other choice.  I found out I was pregnant in September, by October my husband had gotten laid off and thus we were left without insurance. I was very, very sick. Nothing was curbing the nausea and not an OBGYN office in town would touch me. A local pharmacist had told me that Planned Parenthood would see me regardless, and he was right! They never pushed termination; they gave me a urine test and helped me get Medicad. We began to praise God that these ladies were able to help me when NO OTHER individual or organization was willing to. He was already showing us that He was faithful to provide.

For most people a layoff with a pregnant wife would be scary, but they would pull from the savings account until they could replace it. We didn’t have that. When we moved here after hearing God lead us to come help with the launch of Vantage Pointe we used what little savings we had to get us down here. After his layoff we both applied for jobs left right and center on both sides of the border to no avail. We withdrew our entire retirement and began rationing it out to cover rent and food. As time went by and no jobs were had it became apparent that something else had to go. We had terminated cable and Internet early on, and so we woul only drive to church and back or to the store so as not use gas. Next came coffee elimination, then finally the food budget. Our money stretched and by the Grace of God, managed to eat one meal a day, and buy Aaron’s myriad of medications he took once he arrived home.

While I missed out on getting to have a glider ottoman, and nursery set up, or picking out baby clothes God lead us to Open Arms Pregnancy Center where we were given hope and the most wonderful gift of bottles, jammies and a nice warm blanket. A lady on Craigslist was giving away some items and a church family gave me a breast pump so I could express milk while Aaron was in the NICU. It would also sustain him for months after until my milk dried up and we had to use formula.

It was during that time that I began to re-evaluate Philippians 4:19

“And my God will supply all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus.  I often confuse my wants for my needs. I wanted a beautiful nursery, a big dresser full of tiny clothes. But I didn’t NEED those things! He slept in his car seat beside the bed. It was hot that year he was born so he could get by in a diaper. Eventually we found a rocknplay and when he outgrew that he came into our bed until Ronnie started work and we could get him a toddler bed. Was it ideal, NO! But we managed. All were fed, with a roof over our heads.

Ronnie has been back in the US and to work just over 2 years. We have begun rebuying the items we sold to survive; dressers, end tables, furniture and dishes. As we meet other people struggling we can try and be an encouragement that things CAN get better. We can point to Gods provision of a few simple items that made a big difference.  

If you know us apart from my Blog you know we now drive BMW, BUT PLEASE know that it is 12years old. The back bumper is missing; there is no display screens, cameras, or navigation.   Some of the standard features no longer work, and it hates to start when it’s cold. (Not good in Upstate Winters). But it runs, looks decent and was the same price as the Ford on the lot beside it, with better space. We are now purposing to get out of debt, and stay out of Debt and are working through the Financial Freedom Seminar. God has been building a Life’s Message in us and we look forward to all that He has in store for us in the coming years.

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Sometimes You Just Need an Iced Coffee

It’s no secret that IcedCoffee is what keeps me standing upright! Between kids, and course work, housework and church “stuff” I seem to be running around most of the time.  One day a few weeks ago it seemed i was even to busy to run and grab iced coffee… WHAT AM I GONG TO DO?  Enter this little bottle of bliss!

icedsqueezeRonnie had brought it home from Hannaford the other day and at first I thought it was a not so subtle way of telling me i need to spend less at the Coffee Shop, but no he said “its for those days that you JUST CANT!  For my night shift ladies (and gents) who like me have worked in facilities where you were not able to leave,or your a midwife and your mama comes first so skipping out to grab coffee with her dilated to 9cm might result in some un-pleasentries shouted your way.  THIS IS FOR YOU!! I was skeptical! I am loyal to my few iced coffee places and that is it.  But a bit of this little squeeze bottle added to icey cold water, then splashed liberally with half’n’half did the trick!  It saved my sanity AND my budget.  Now it says there are 10 servings per bottle, but I say there is more like 6 (I like my coffee strong.) It cost less than $4 making each serving ~$0.67 a serving.  This review WAS NOT sponsored, although I wish it were LOL 🙂 Seriously getting paid to drink coffee would be nice.  But either way if you are looking for an easy, and inexpensive alternative to store bought Iced Coffee you may want to give this a go!!

Juxtaposition

“where are the Post Op Mattresses?” she shouted at me.
“I’m sorry Deb we are max capacity and are using all of them”
“this is UNACCEPTABLE!” she threw her hand up in exasperation.

She had every right to be upset our protocol was that all post op moms got special mattresses that made their beds more comfortable, and dispersed their weight a little more evenly.  I was an active participant in 70 births at the birth Center. 70 births and not one maternal or fetal death, no brain damage from hypoxia, no hemorrhages that were not well managed by medication or intervention.  We had excess supplies, three meals a day and snack packs for breastfeeding moms.  You could labor in a tub or a shower, with a ball or a bench. there was endless hot water, and copious amounts of clean icey drinking water.

Cross the equator with me, step outside the Air-Con and into Belle’s place of employment. Belle works in the Philippines where mothers and babies are dying daily, midwives are overworked, clean drinking water is a real issue.  Moms are malnourished, bleeding is catastrophic, birth is scary.  Post op mattresses don’t exist, quite honestly you are lucky to have a clean bed, or a bed at all. While the US complains that the eggs are cold, the 3rd world is dealing with infection, abuse, and death.

I love birth, births where moms are supported, babies have a fighting chance, and healthcare providers meet a minimum standard of knowledge.

I want that for everyone.  I want women globally to have a birth where they are safe, where they are cared for, where they have access to a skilled and loving midwife.  I want to be immersed in birth in places where birth is not a joy but a fear so that maybe, just maybe things will change.

everymother

IT’S HERE!!!

My new doppler from Newman Medical arrived yesterday.  I heard the UPS truck and the tell tale thump of a parcel being left on the porch.  I hadn’t really been sure when it was going to arrive, so I just figured Ronnie had ordered a book for work or something. When I stepped out I saw the box! I got filled with anticipation, and I may have done a little happy dance LOL.  When I opened the box I heard angels sing and a light shone down from heaven.  Ok no not re20141006_141909ally… but it was a really exciting moment.  Inside the box was 1 Digidop700 it is extremely solid and has a bit of weight to it which is perfect for going on adventures around the world and being jostled about in a backpack/birth bag.  They also included batteries and a small travel size tube of high end doppler gel.  The probe is waterproof and the cord is long so you do not have to worry about the main unit getting wet.  The rep I spoke to agreed that a rechargeable unit was not ideal because I will more than likely be in areas with limited or no electricity for charging, so this unit takes 3 AA batteries.  The power button is conveniently located on the front and it raised for easily finding it if it is dark.  The LCD display has lit numbers, again very useful for auscultating in the dark.  I noticed when I turned it on that is is really quiet.  Not all static-y like some other dopplers I have used or had used on me.  My Midwife has a Summit Doppler that has a lot of background static, so much so that you can hear the static from another room.   I love how the probe handle is magnetic and simply “sticks” to the top of the doppler, instead of clipping into the unit.  Huntleigh dopplers are famous for their probe clips breaking early on which is really quite annoying considering you are spending $600 on something you hope to last you many many years.  I feel so blessed to have been able to get this doppler.  I really believe that this is the best option for my needs.

Blessed!

Today I was in contact with Newman Medical, the makers of the Digidop Fetal Doppler.  One retailer describes them as “bulletproof” (figuratively I am sure lol) Mr. Newman suggested the DigiDop 700.

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What is that?  Well here is what they had to say about it!

The DigiDop 700 WATERPROOF Display Doppler has unique features not found in other Doppler systems such as Digital Optimized Processing (DOP™). Each DigiDop is designed with the sensitivity you need while also designed to be tough and last through years of everyday office use. All our products are  Made in the USA outside of Denver, CO. Each Newman Medical Doppler and probe must pass a series of comprehensive tests to assure quality and the durability of each product.

Features:

  • Display Hand Held Doppler
  • Tough and durable polycarbonate and stainless steel case
  • Digitally Optimized Processing – DOP™
  • Unbreakable magnetic probe holder
  • All probes are interchangable
  • Each main unit comes with choice of one probe (I am getting the waterproof model)
  • User replaceable cable
  • Powered by 3 AA batteries
  • Extended battery life
  • Manufactured in the U.S.A

I am feeling so blessed right now!  There is alot of hype right now about the use of dopplers for maternity care, and I have strong opinions about that, which is certainly a blog post for another day.

Well my loves, I must sign off but wanted to fill you in on how God is blessing.
Much LOVE!

How to know?

I have been talking about my journey to Midwifery, and I think Ronnie and I have finally decided on where I am going to do my academics.  A lot of the programs were Diploma’s or Certificates, but this program will lead to a Bachelor of Midwifery ( BMid ) and focuses on not just midwifery but permaculture, sustainable living, and the Global Maternal Child Health Crisis.  My Midwifery skills conference that I have been excited about has hit a few bumps so I am now trying to decide if this is God closing the door on it, or if I just need to push through.

Bump 1)  My sitter for the two days just realized that is the week that they have mandatory training for work. ( a conference out of town)

Bump 2) FInances.  The cost of the workshop is $300 (if we pay by september 1st) and we were all for it but we blew a tire on friday, and  you can only drive on a spare for 45miles and so we will need to replace our tires (WAY overdue anyway) So that will take up any extra money we may have had allocated for my conference 😦

Now I have a belief that what God ordains will come to pass despite things seeming Humanly Impossible. He can provide tires, and money for the conference, and Childcare can fall into place!

Heres where you all come in! I am asking for people to pray with us,

Pray that God will provide the resources for me to go!

Pray that we find childcare for the duration of the course (2 days)

Pray that we get clear confirmation of what we need to do, and how to proceed.

Thanks guys for being here with me.  Love that the “body of Christ” can be felt via the web, modern technology is great!!

Jesus Lead on.

My vision seems so cloudy these days, and I mean my spiritual vision, I just got new glasses so my eyes are in perfect health LOL.  I have been in the word more than ever, and yet I cannot seem to get clarity on this one issue.  I posted previously about a stirring in my heart towards missions.  Well that has not go away.  My husband and I have thrown around a few ideas and scenarios, and I am slated to go to my midwifery skills course in October (funds pending).  Here’s how it all breaks down.  I feel like I want to be able to use midwifery on the mission field on a Trip by Trip basis, not career missions.  To do that I need to become a midwife.  There are possibilities for that to happen and we are open to them but they cost money. Then there is the opportunity to go to a charity birthing center overseas that does specific HANDS ON training for women desiring to be missionary midwives.  The cost to do that is humanly HUGE; $7,000-$12,000!  But then I think… really if it is God ordained it isn’t huge at all!  We have talked about different ways of doing it (me going alone, or them coming too) For about 4 years I have felt a pull to this area, and to the clinic specifically.   I  cannot see to get them out of my head.  They serve very poor women who cannot afford maternity care.  All care received is free of charge, and from what friends have told me who have been there, the care is fantastic!  The clinic relies on the support of Missionaries like myself coming to train and then after certification come back and volunteer.  They employ local midwives who work tirelessly serving these woman.  I ask you all to pray with me on the God’s timing to be revealed, and for the appropriate funding when the time comes.